Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Randomize
