so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize