Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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