what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
She's going to get me a sippy cup for christmas. If I can't open it, I can't have any more to drink. Seem reasonable?
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
