I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
this just has baby written all over it
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
