Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
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