you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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