: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
