I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You are a genius and a whore.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
