if you find a joe biden blowup doll in the attic, I call dibs
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
