Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
My roommate's all sad and is crying and the chick I want to bang is in the room and Nic Cage is on fire. What the fuck.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
As shirtless as possible
Let's paint friendship bongs
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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