he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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