If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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