wake up i wanna do it froggy style
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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