you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
