do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
Randomize