Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Dude, I just rear-ended a cab
Are you drunk?
A little...yes
Run!
Terrible brother advice.
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Randomize
