Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
