I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
Randomize