I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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