If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize