And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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