no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
