what if every blade of grass was a penis?
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
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