guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
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