i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
