Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
