she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
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