wanna go halves on a baby?
im about as happy as oj after his trial
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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