I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
try to milk me bitch
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