Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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