I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
accomplished twins. life is a go
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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