a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
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just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
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His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
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