it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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