it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Oh, fuck yeah. I swear I came with every bite. Not even joking. Messiest meal ever.
Wow, thanks for ruining pizza for me. I didn't think it was possible.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
