it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
