he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Randomize
