Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
