I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he was CRYING into my vagina
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
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