ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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