We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Randomize
