Well apparently he's into motor boating.
so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
Randomize