Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
