i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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