TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
Randomize
