I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends