We named our party play list daddy issues
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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