I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
