im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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