Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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